I was reading my fantastic brother Mike's blog about some of the things he heard at the Pepperdine lectures. I have also been reading the amazing things that Timmy has been saying about evangelism. I'm just wondering what it is going to take for us to really and I mean really get the message of Jesus. I mean, all of my life, I have known about Christ, I have gone to church and often times thought I was worshipping Christ. Why can't I love people, and by love people I mean really love people, the way that Christ wants me to? What is wrong with me? Where did I fall and totally and completely miss the mark? Why am I so stubborn? Why am I so unwilling to live my life with passion for the God who makes it possible for me to be in relationship with Him? Why do I so crave the trappings of the world when it so clear that my life is full when I am in Christ? Why do I get so caught up in my imperfections and lack the desire to share the saving power of Jesus with others because I fear that they will reject me? How dare I! How dare I not share Him with everyone I encounter! How dare I not ask my friends to hold me to holy living! How dare I not hold my friends to holy living! Will I look foolish? Maybe! Does it matter? No. I have been saved from my sin and yet I chose over and over to live in it and turn my back on the One who freed me from the death that comes with sin. Why do we continue to chose death? Why do we chose death for others by withholding the Gospel out of our own personal insecurities? I think if I truly felt the transforming power of the Gospel, I wouldn't have these hangups. How do I swallow the depth of the Message? Do I need to spend time working through the spiritual disciplines? What do we need to do? What is it going to take for us to really get it? What are we afraid of? What would the world look like if we all became dangerous Christians, unapologetic, unafraid, unrestrained...what would happen if we all let go of whatever doctrine that we have emersed ourselves in and emersed ourselves in the blood of Jesus Christ?
I know that my thoughts are jumbled. What I know for sure is that we have got to get serious about the faith that we claim to have. I need to get busy loving people and finding ways to meet people where they are and not expect them to walk through the doors of Living Streams and understand what is happening there (no matter what that may look like).
Lord, please reveal to me in an unquestionable way the Gospel as you intended it. Help me fight through my own issues so that others may also have life with you. May I never hold back your message out of my own fear. Continue to love me in the way that only you can and show me how to love others the way that you want me to. Please forgive me for all of the times that I haven't chosen to do the right thing for whatever reason I may have done it. Thank you for being a forgiving Father, a loving Father who wants nothing but the best for each of us, I know you want us to all live full happy lives covered in the peace of knowing that you are in love with us and can't wait to be reunited with us. What else could I possibly need?
6 comments:
oh rebecca. rebecca rebecca rebecca. when did you get into my mind and steal my thoughts? i didn't even see you there.
it's CRAZY. we will tell anyone who will listen, up to and including the grocery clerk about Arbonne, or the latest book we read, or whatever, but not Christ? why why why do we do this?
i mean, i KNOW why, satan. but we know who he is, and we know the tricks he uses, yet we still fail.
please read "i" for every "we" i just typed. i'm calling myself out here, no one else.
i know that sometimes, i don't speak out for God because i'm afraid of how i will look or sound, which is nuts because in general, i'm the one person you can count on for not giving a hoot about how i'm perceived. why do i choose God to be the one thing i hold back on? HE is the only one i should care to look good for.
uhg. i'll stop rambling, as i'm clearly not going anywhere but why why why.
definatly something i need to spend time in prayer over.
Don't listen to those guys. They're total wackos. Wackadoos even.
hee hee, tim said "wackadoo."
I know...whackadoo...funny, especially since he's talking about himself. I hope he is my brother forever! :)
Don't get down on yourself.
Our church of Christ backgrounds have given us the DNA to look at the world under a certain hermeneutic. We need to just realize that the hermeneutic isn't very good and that there may be more than one way to do things "at church."
You're not the first person to feel like that...so don't get down on yourself too hard...that's why we follow Christ.
Thanks brother.
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